What to Think

After wandering around for hours in the garden trying to figure out what is the truth, I am still unsure what to believe. For know I must put on a fake smile and act cheerful for fear of anyone finding out what has happened between me and Darcy. Colonel Fitzwilliam has arrived at Rosings and has been waiting for me for hours to return from my walk. I think he knows that I have rejected Darcy's proposal. I hope he hasn't said anything to Charlotte or Collins, I'm not ready for them to know. What are they going to think when they hear of what I have done. It shouldn't matter to me anyways its my life and I'll live it how I want to.